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| I was up crying all night, trying to figure out what to do. But they didn’t give a damn! Just kept on teasing me, laughing at me, calling me names, talking ‘bout how stupid I am for getting pregnant by some damn color me Black Senator, who ain’t lobbying for nothing but pussy. How they ain’t goan buy my baby no diapers. Ain’t goan baby sit. My baby ain’t goan have nobody, cause the Senator’s wife goan kill my ass. Just all kinda mean hurtful shit! I sat up in my bed and held my pillow in my hands, both sides wet like the size of my face. Then I looked over at the window and saw the sun creeping through the crevices of my curtains, revealing little particles of dust floating in my room. Like um gonna clean that shit soon! I ignored the dust and its bad health consequences, but I couldn’t ignore the truth biting at my heels. I had made a mistake telling the bitch squad about my pregnancy. There was a tainted mixed reaction. Somebody said, “Congratulayshons!” Somebody said, “Humph!” Somebody said, “Well, what the fuck then!” All I remember is asking what I should do about it. That’s when all the madness started. If ever you were afraid of secrets getting out, you know the ones you tell your best, best friends not to tell nobody. And you threaten their lives if they so much as breathe a word. And they breathe a word all over every where till what you actually said is so mixed up in the “ghetto press,” it’s impossible to figure out whose secret it was in the first place. If this is you, and I know it could be, then you know how I feel right now. For instance, if Michael Jordan, NBA basketball hero, Michael Jordan, stood in your face and told you that one of his boys was on the DL. That’s down low for homosexuals for the ones who are scared to come out. You’d believe him, right? After all, even if it was a dirty joke, which only he could get away with and still keep his friends, why would Michael lie? You feel that, that’s what I’ m going through. Only it’s deadly! And mines ain‘t even a lie, it’s the damn truth! It just got out the wrong way. Donna, this girl I’ve known since I was five, just a lying stankin’ hoe. She make six figures, light skinned, long black hair, think she the black Farah Fawcett or some shit. All she do is smile and show those $500 pearly whites she keep buying every three months. I been making sure she gets a slice of cherry pie every rare blue, blue moon we go to lunch, hoping to God to stain that bitch a bit. I know it’s God’s job to judge. But here lately, I’ve been doing a real good job right there on the spot. You probably think um hating too, but let me tell you who this bitch is. She, first of all, fucked my daddy! Not my real daddy, my step daddy. So you know I didn’t care, but my momma did! When we was kids, she was always in his face smiling. In high school, she was always thanking him for something, Thank you for holding the door for me Mr. Patton. Thank you for smiling at me Mr. Patton. Thank you for looking my way Mr. Patton. Thank you for the Time Mr. Patton. Oh Jesus, shut up bitch! So I can thank you for that. Anyways, my momma was like, “Stop bringing that damn girl here! Swear to God I’m gonna kill her, if she don’t leave my man alone!” She had a point, Donna was famous for Titts & Ass costumes. My momma said she was raised by mad whores from Funky Town, Mississippi, which to my mom means the ghetto in the south. She came over to our house one day. I had to tell her to go change her damn clothes. She had on a sweater that was showing her nipple hairs. And her pants were so tight, if she were to bend, we’d suddenly know all her business. Momma really, really hated that girl. Well sho nuff, when momma and my step daddy got divorced. Donna was the first one to tell me and everybody else about it. “Old Patty Pat’s available now, ya’ll,” she said twirling her index finger with some damn double mint gum, shaking her ass from side to side, making a dance about it. “I just wanna thank him for all he’s done. You’d don’t mind do you, Tina?” Oh wait, let me catch my breath! Okay, na, na, hold me back! Hold me back! I had the urge to kick her ass! I don’t even know why we friends. Oh that’s right, she makes six figures. Networkin’s a bitch. Anyways, so my momma was at the Motel Six with my step daddy’s ex-boss, they was coming out, and my step daddy and Donna was going in. My momma said she just jumped that hoe. My momma said if Tony, that’s my step daddy’s ex-boss, hadn’t pulled her off of her, she’d’ve been dead. I couldn’t believe it myself. I was hoping she was playing when she said that shit about fucking my step daddy. But noooo. And I ain’t playing, my momma didn’t have one scratch, so I knew she kicked her ass for both of us. Momma said my step daddy, Hank, he was just standing there like a damn statue. A fucking statue! Imagine that. He just didn’t do nothin’. The police came and arrested my momma. She was calling me and my brother to bail her out. How fucking ever, this was get your freakin’ fuck on Friday like every Friday is, for everybody that’s grown and sexy and non- abstinent. ‘Cause me and my man, (no, not the Senator, this was somebody else back then) and my brother and his girl was busy getting our freak on. Phone calls went to voice mail! Tony had to bail my momma out. When I finally checked my messages I had about ten desperate pleas for help. “Damn it girl, if you don’t answer this phone! Girl answer this mother fucking phone! See you goan do me like that huh,” and on and on and on. My brother said, she told him if he didn’t answer the phone, she was goan cut his thang off. He was mad, said his cell phone kept vibrating on the dresser making his girl think other hoes was calling while they was having sex. Notice I didn’t say making love, ‘cause they just fucking. But she don’t know it yet. He she kept looking over his shoulder talking about, “What’s wrong wit yo damn phone!” Oooh, he was so mad. When I told him what happened, he said, he was goan fuck Hank ass up! Not for trying to get with Donna, but for making momma break his mood. He said that nigga was always causin’ him pain, and now he’s about to pay up big time. |
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